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People hook up in their social circles all the time. Your responses, eselle, were remarkable for being exactly what you said; consistent without regard to the sex of the person involved. First, by not focusing on the fact that you're inexperienced. I can assure you that in person, I don't self-flagellate as much if at all. Female sexual satisfaction taking a backseat to male orgasms? I think there's a lot of danger in that sentence "if you have to ask…". Saying that that is THE goal doesn't help anybody, any more than saying that skinny bodies, or athletic bodies, or curvy bodies are THE goal.